Next Year I Hope To...

Day 31 of the Boho Berry December Challenge is about what I hope to be able to do next year.



In no particular order, here is what I hope to do next year:

• Be an STM at a Joni and Friends Retreat
• Be in a loving, caring relationship with a significant other
• Get my driver's license
• Clean up and redecorate my bedroom
• Purchase a good-quality laptop
• Purchase a good-quality DSLR
• Get better at cake and cookie decorating
• Learn Spanish
• Learn Sign Language
• Start writing a book
• Get a tattoo in memory of my mom
• Start playing the violin again, on a regular basis
• Spend a day in Chicago
• Talk to my friends on a more regular basis
• Go to a concert of one of my favorite musical artists
• Go to a paint night
• Learn how to sew
• Make a vision board/book
• Learn how to make macarons
• Go to Medieval Times
• Go on a road trip with friends
• See the Hamilton play
• Learn how to play the ukulele
• Learn to how do fishtail braids
• Learn how to do French braids
• Learn how to do milkmaid braids
• Visi New York
• Go horseback riding again
• Host a game night
• Visit my oldest brother and his wife
• Learn how to apply makeup
• Dye my hair purple
• Get another piercing in each ear
• Get my nose pierced
• Take a self defense class
• Plant trees
• Write letters to those who mean a lot to me
• Become more confident in myself
• Learn how to crochet or knit a sweater

I can't believe tomorrow is New Year's!! How is it even possible?! 2019 went by so fast. But, I am looking forward to 2020, and all the possibilities it holds!

To Be Honest, I Would Rather...

Day 30 of the Boho Berry December Challenge is about things I would rather be doing.


If I am being truly honest, I would rather be living somewhere very remote, away from people.

People tend to judge me before they really get to know me, and I have come to just not say anything (mostly because I am too shy to say something), because I see no point in that.

Being away from everyone, and everything, would take away a lot of stress and anxiety for me, and I wouldn't have to deal with judgment, and ignorance.

Living remotely would let me relax, I can do my own thing, and not have to worry about other people. I can be me, without many worries, or cares.

The Bravest Thing I Ever Did

Day 29 of the Boho Berry December Challenge is about the bravest thing I ever did.


I think the bravest thing I ever did was to say goodbye to my mom.

She died in November 2010, and that was the absolute hardest, and bravest, thing I had to do.
I loved her very much, and did not want her to go.

Even though we knew it was coming, I was not ready to say goodbye to her.

We had our disagreements, and we got mad at each other (quite a lot), but I still loved her through everything.

I still love her. Very much.

It is a struggle living without her, but I have had many good days that I am so very thankful for. I just wish she was her to make them even better.

She was a very strong woman, even with all the health issues she had gone through. I think she gave me some of her strength, to be able to live without her, but it is very hard to go on without her.

I am very thankful that I had her for as long as I did, and I hope to see her again one day.

Right Now I Need...

Day 28 of the Boho Berry December Challenge is about what I need right now.

These are the things that I need right now:

• My mom (she died 9 years ago, and I miss her so much)
• A long vacation
• A spa day
• A massage
• More money saved up
• Confidence in myself
• More friends
• A relationship with a significant other
• A clean and redecorated bedroom
• A new bed set
• To donate stuff I don't need/want anymore (in good condition, of course!), as I have a TON of stuff, and I know I don't need/want some of those things anymore
• My driver's license
• My own laptop
• A healthier body and mind

Biggest Life Lesson So Far

Day 27 of the Boho Berry December Challenge is about my biggest life lesson so far.



My biggest life lesson so far, is probably learning how to live on my own, without relying on my parents for everything. How to be more responsible for my own well-being.

With my parents doing many things for me, I haven't had to worry about much until recently. I am learning how to manage my money and banking habits(it's starting to get better), make important phone calls (I HATE talking on the phone), travel on my own, make appointments on my own, and other "adult" things.

Since I am so shy and introverted, these things are hard for me to do on my own, and I am trying to take more responsibility, and to get more comfortable in making more decisions on my own. I don't want to have to rely on other people all the time, to do things for me that I should be doing myself.

My Vision For the Future

Day 26 of the Boho Berry December Challenge is about what my vision for the future looks like.


I have been thinking about the future a lot lately, about what I would like to do/experience/etc.

My vision for the future includes:

• Moving out of my parents' house, and moving into my own place
• Getting into a relationship with a significant other
• Getting married
• Having children
• Adopting (both humans and animals)
• Traveling as much as possible
• Making my own family traditions
• Becoming a baker
• Becoming a photographer
• Becoming more confident in myself
• Learning to love myself
• Growing in my faith
• Helping out with Wheels for the World
• Taking better care of my body and mind
• Getting my driver's license
• Going to concerts and plays
• Making more good friends
• Learning how to apply makeup (properly)
• Relearning how to play the violin, and play on a regular basis
• Learning how to play the piano
• Learning how to do different braids, other hairstyles
• Writing and sending/giving letters to friends, letting them know how much they mean to me
• Becoming fluent in sign language
• Becoming fluent in Spanish
• Becoming fluent in Italian
• Cooking more for myself, others
• Making as many good, happy memories as possible

I'm Looking Forward To...

Day 25 of the Boho Berry Decembere Challenge is about things I am looking forward to.


There are a few things I am looking forward to:

• Joni and Friends Maranatha Retreat (I went this past summer, and I really hope I get to go again next summer...and for as many years after that, as I am able to)
• Joni and Friends Walk N Roll (I was able to go to this event this past September, and again, I hope I get to go again next year, and for as many years after that, as possible)
• Hopefully getting my driver's license (and getting more confident in driving)
• Getting my bedroom walls repainted
• Getting new furniture for my bedroom (bed frame and mattress, etc.)
• Getting better at cake decorating
• Being more independent
• Being in a relationship with a significant other (I am more than ready for a relationship)
• Being more confident in myself
• Taking a more active role in my passions (photography, baking, writing)
• Taking better care of myself (physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually)
• Cooking more often
• Baking more often
• Reading more often
• Making a lot more wonderful memories!!

Quotes That Inspire Me

Day 24 of the Boho Berry December Challenge is about quotes that inspire me.

"We've all got both light and dark inside us. What matters is the part we choose to act on. That's who we really are." 

Sirius Black (Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix)

 

"Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light."  Albus Dumbledore (Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban)

 

“Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.”  
George Bernard Shaw

 

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”  
― Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of "A Course in Miracles"

 

 

When the sharpest words wanna cut me down
I'm gonna send a flood, gonna drown them out
I am brave, I am bruised
I am who I'm meant to be, this is me
Look out 'cause here I come
And I'm marching on to the beat I drum
I'm not scared to be seen
I make no apologies, this is me

-Lyrics from The Greatest Showman Song "This is Me"

 

"You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them."

Maya Angelou

 

“Prayer is not asking. It is a longing of the soul. It is daily admission of one's weakness. It is better in prayer to have a heart without words than words without a heart.”
― Mahatma Gandhi  

My Definition of Success

Day 23 of the Boho Berry December Challenge is about what my definition of success is.


My definition of success is:

• Doing things that you love, and that bring you joy and peace
• Having someone that loves you, and that you love (anyone, not just a partner)
• Making as many wonderful memories as possible
• Being kind, compassionate to others (not judging, putting people down)
• Having an open mind about other people, and experiences
• Not taking everything seriously, and having fun sometimes
• Taking care of physical, mental, and emotional self
• Living the best possible life you can
• Being yourself

If Money Weren't an Issue, I Would...

Day 22 of the Boho Berry December Challenge is about what I would do if money wasn't an issue.

If money was not an issue, I would (in no particular order):

• Travel to every place I want to visit
• Get a DSLR camera that works for me
• Get a laptop that works for me
• Move into my own place
• Adopt and raise horses and dogs
• Get all the gaming consoles I would like to get, and the games I would like to play on them
• Help as many people in need as I can
• Help as many animals as I can
• Meet my favorite famous people
• Take more college classes on things that interest me
• Go to concerts (Andrea Bocelli, Garth Brooks, Blue Man Group, etc.)
• Go to Broadway/off-Broadway plays
• Go to more Joni and Friends Retreats
• Go on Wheels for the World trips
• Go horseback riding more often
• Go to more pro baseball games
• Go to pro hockey games
• Buy a car
• Practice cake decorating skills a lot more often
• Knit and crochet more often
• Foster animals
• Visit Disney Land
• Visit Disney World
• Spend Christmas or New Year's in a different state or country
• Visit The Wizarding World of Harry Potter
• Write and publish at least one book
• Get a tattoo in memory of my mom

What I Wanted to Be When I Grew Up

Day 21 of the Boho Berry December Challenge is about what I wanted to be when I grew up.


When I was growing up I really wanted to be a teacher, an author, a cop, and a baker.

I ruled out cop after junior high, because I don't like confrontation, and I am afraid that if I get shot, I may die, and I don't want to die on the job.

I have partially ruled out teacher, because I don't like having attention on me, I am very shy, and I didn't really like school much, although I still have a strong desire to be a teacher.

I still want to be a baker and an author, as I don't necessarily have to talk a lot, focus isn't on me, and I can make things people would like/love.

My Favorite Childhood Memories

Day 20 of the Boho Berry December Challenge is about my favorite childhood memories.

• My best friend from elementary school and I would make a bunch of paper snowflakes, and when we were done, we would put them in sandwich bags and hand them out to the other people in her apartment building
• My best friend and I playing school, taking turns playing teacher and student
• Having sleepovers with cousins when my family and I would travel to Wisconsin every summer
• Girl Scouts campouts field trips, selling cookies
• Playing with the Easy Bake Oven I got for Christmas one year
• Going trick-or-treating with friends when we were in junior high
• Going swimming with my mom every summer
• Participating in the local park district's Girls Getaway club, doing different activities eah week (horseback riding, playing tennis, arcades
• Going to an indoor arcade and outdoor gaming place in Michigan, when my family and I would travel to Michigan every summer (or many summers); they had mini golf, go carts, and a few other things; the arcade and outdoor stuff was part of one business
• Going on a school field trip to the city, to visit famous landmarks
• Participating in an after-school Multicultral arts program at my elementary school
• Participating in the local library's summer reading program in elementary school
• Volunteering with the library's summer reading program in junior high and high school
• Watching cartoons in the morning on Saturdays and Sundays, while eating cinnamon toast that my mom made

If This Was My Last Day on Earth...

Day 19 of the Boho Berry December Challenges is about if today was my last day on earth.


If today was my last day on earth, I would be sad that I couldn't have made some of my dreams come true.

I really want to get married, have children of my own, travel the world, and do work that I love (baking, photography, writing books, and possibly teaching elementary school), and I would be sad if I didn't get the chance to have those opportunities.

On the other hand, I would be able to see my mom, grandparents, and some of my friends again, who have passed away.

I miss all of them very much, and want to see them again, but I am not quite ready to leave this life yet.

Although, if today was my last day in this life, I would accept it, even though I am afraid of death. I am trying to not be afraid, and to accept that part of life, but it is hard for me. I am working on it, though.

The Most Unique Thing About Me

Day 18 of the Boho Berry December Challenge is about the most unique thing about me.


The most unique thing about me is probably my iris coloboma.

An iris coloboma is where the iris (and in my case the pupil) didn't form properly, so it looks like a key hole (I saw it described that way, and thought that was the perfect description, as it does look like that).

I actually don't know anyone who has a coloboma, as well, so I feel kind of like I'm the only one with the condition.

I am trying to learn to accept and love this part of me, but it is hard, as there isn't much I do like about myself.

I would have also included the birthmark I had on my neck, but as I had it removed several years ago, it would be pointless to have included it.

I'm Really Good At

Day 17 of the Boho Berry December Challenge is about what I am really good at.


I am really good at (or decently good at):

• Listening to people
• Taking pictures
• Baking
• Writing
• Making lists (I LOVE lists!!)
• Knitting
• Crochet
• Surprising myself by doing things I thought I couldn't do (or was too afraid to do)
• Being alone (I prefer to be alone a lot these days)
• Day dreaming
• Being willing to learn new things
• Spending time in nature

My Five Best Habits

Day 16 of the Boho Berry December Challenge is about my five best habits.


I think my five best habits are:

1. Saying please and thank you
2. Holding doors for people
3. Putting (some) things in the same place every day, so I know where they are
4. Listening to people when they need/want to talk
5. Trying things that help me to relax/unwind if I am stressed or upset

My Five Worst Habits

Day 15 of the Boho Berry December Challenge is about my five worst habits.



My five worst habits are:

1. Not cleaning up after myself, when it comes to my bedroom
2. Spending way too much time on the computer/phone
3. Freezing up when being put on the spot, not knowing what to say or do
4. Spending too much money, especially on things I don't really need
5. Using most of my time in a very unproductive way
6. Bonus: Not speaking up most of the time, if I have something to say, especially if I need help

I want to be able to work on doing better with these habits, and doing better in life in general.

Traits I Admire in Others

Day 14 of the Boho Berry December Challenge is about traits that I admire in others.


Traits I admire in others:

• Generosity
• Honesty (even if it hurts)
• Helping others in need
• Truly listening, especially without judgment
• Giving, without expecting things in return/without strings attached
• Love of adventure/travel
• Accepting others, no matter what
• Empathy towards others
• Love of animals
• Adapting to changes with ease
• Being open-minded
• Confident in who they are and what they want
• Sensitive to the needs of others
• Strength in the face of hard times

How I Want to Be Remembered

Day 13 of the Boho Berry December Challenge is about how I would like to be remembered.


I would like to be remembered for:

• Being kind and caring
• Listening (REALLY listening) when someone wants/needs to talk
• My love of animals
• My love of children
• My fun side
• My inner child
• My empathy
• My open-mindedness
• My love of baking
• My love of photography
• My love of writing
• My strength in hard times
• Inspiring others (in a good way)
• My volunteerism/giving of my time
• My gentle side
• My compassionate side
• My love of music
• My love of travel
• My passion for the disability community
• Going after the things I wanted in life

Things That Make Me Feel Better

Day 12 of the Boho Berry December Challenge is about things that make me feel better.

In no particular order, these are the things that help me feel better:

• Texting a friend
• Listening to my favorite music
• Journaling/writing/blogging
• Alone time in my bedroom
• Watching YouTube videos
• Baking
• Cooking
• Taking pictures
• Watching movies
• Taking a warm bath or shower
• Knitting
• Crocheting
• Coloring in a coloring book
• Cuddling with my cats
• Watching my favorite TV shows
• Napping
• Playing games
• Going for walks
• Cozying up under a warm blanket
• Bullet journaling
• Painting
• Having a spa day
• Scrapbooking
• Work on puzzles (jigsaw, crossword, Sudoku, etc.)
• Playing with a fidget toy
• Encouraging words from friends, family
• Traveling