Waves of Grief

Almost nine years on

And I am

Feeling the grief

All over again

 

I wish you were

Still here with me

I wish I could

Talk to you again

Hug you again

See you again

 

The first year without you

Was the hardest thing to do

 

And now it feels

Almost like that again

 

It is so hard

To express

What I am feeling

What I am going through

To others

 

The one I really

Want to talk to

Is the one that

I am grieving for

 

Some days

I wish someone

Would ask me

How I am really doing

 

And I wish

I could just

Open up

 

Let my grief out

And let loved ones in

 

I miss you so much

That it hurts

As much as when

You first left

 

This summer

Has made me realize

Just how much

I need you

How much I love you

How much I wish

That you were

Still here with us

 

How much you mean to me

 

Experiencing

Hearing about

What we

Get to do in life

 

The little things

As well as the big things

That you should have

Been here for

 

This grief

Has been coming

in waves

And I have

Been hurting

Crying

Missing you

 

It has been overwhelming

At times

 

But I know

You are fine

That you are

Not sick

Or suffering

Anymore

 

That you are

Finally at rest

And at peace

 

But it is hard

For me to let go

Of the grief

That I am experiencing

Because you

Are in Heaven

And not here

On earth

 

It is hard

For me

To know that

My confidant

My best friend

Is gone

Is not by my side anymore

 

I love you so much, Mom

And I can't wait

To see you again

One day